Dating During The Pandemic

The impact of social distancing and the pandemic is dramatically affecting everyone’s dating life.

You’re ready to meet someone fantastic, but you wonder if it’s worth it to engage right now.

You might be asking yourself, “to what end?”

Facetime dates feel awkward and Zoom dinner dates just aren’t taking the place of real face to face interaction. First dates have enough challenges without suddenly needing to be an expert on camera. It just feels odd and forced.

There isn’t a perfect substitute for a real date. It’s what makes dating and interacting with women so interesting. But, there’s a way to manage your personal life right now that just might be a total game changer.

We’re currently in Phase 2 of re-opening and not yet sure when restaurants, bars and venues will be open. But, there’s more than the shutdown of venues and restaurants for you to consider when dating during the pandemic.

It’s the mindset of women.

If you want to succeed, take a deeper look and work to understand the female perspective. I’m hearing thoughts, panic, questions and frustrations from women each and every day and I thought I would pass on the information to you so that you’re prepared for dating during the pandemic and beyond.

Here are 5 Things to Consider:

1. Women seek security. Men seek adventure. Don’t ask a woman to meet you in person after just a phone call or two. You might be brave but most women are exercising a bit more caution. It’s a health crisis we’re going through. Be patient. Allow her to get to know you gradually and build trust. A lot of women are sharing that men are too quick to ask for a date right now. Be careful as this is only adding pressure that makes everyone retreat.
2. Shift your own mindset. Rather than taking a break from “dating” altogether, consider this an opportunity to build connections at a slower pace. I know it’s frustrating, but the way to a woman’s heart, mind and body is through steady, consistent, positive action.
3. Connect via phone. Prior to the pandemic, a call was just a means to an end. A way to briefly chat and plan a date. Since we now understand that women are not as comfortable with this, the phone needs to become your friend. You’ll need a delicate balance of building a connection and not trying to build a relationship. Two very different things.
4. Go to video if you MUST. Going too quickly to a FaceTime or Zoom date feels pushed and rushed. I’ve seen this kill romantic potential if it doesn’t go well. Use this medium only if you’ve been speaking for a couple of weeks and the mutual interest is obvious. It’s a way of meeting the woman you’ve been having a great time on the phone with rather than a way of seeing her face to calculate interest or chemistry.
5. You’re saving valuable time and money. Dates are expensive. Think of this time of connecting on the phone as a way of learning about new women, yourself and a way to explore new introductions without the responsibility of date planning. You’ll only need to be economical with how many women you’re talking with on a weekly basis. Otherwise, you won’t be able to invest yourself in a way that’s meaningful and thoughtful.

Above all, just know that these are unprecedented times. We’re all feeling our way through this and like every crisis, it has a way of revealing our best and worst traits. Be patient with yourself. Be patient with the women you’re getting to know. Keep an open mind and for now, go with the flow.

April